one step at a time..

reflecting at the end of my obstetrics posting, I find a lot of thoughts running along in my mind about medicine, life, my relationship with God, and people. It is amazing how some doctors can forget to look at the patient as a whole sometimes. Greed takes over and some probably don't really realize the consequences of the decisions they make, which will affect the life of not only a patient, but also the society, and the family of the patient. What I've learnt in theory so far is only a tiny milestone ( maybe even milimeterstone) in what lies ahead of me..

there are too many thoughts to address, but i find one that is constantly shining brightly, and that is trusting God.. So many times in the past have i come to dead ends, with no road in front of me, only a brick wall.. and so many times has God been gracious enough to give me the strength to breakthrough this wall! God has provided much, for me and my family, and i find that i can always lean on Him.. truly the bible is full of God's promises to us all!

Easter is coming. I'm hoping my housemates will go for easter in my seremban church.. anyways, God finds ways to inspire me in times when i least expect it :)just got this in my email...

"With God all things are possible"
This story was written by a doctor who worked in South Africa..

One night I had worked hard to help a mother in the labor ward; but in
spite of all we could do, she died leaving us with a tiny premature baby and a
crying two-year-old daughter. We would have difficulty keeping the baby
alive, as we had no incubator (we had no electricity to run an incubator).

We also had no special feeding facilities. Although we lived on the
equator, nights were often chilly with treacherous drafts. One student midwife went for the box we had for such babies and the cotton wool that the baby would
be wrapped in.

Another went to stoke the fire and fill a hot water bottle. She came back
shortly in distress to tell me that in filling the bottle, it had burst
(rubber perishes easily in tropical climates). "And it is our last hot
water bottle!" she exclaimed. As in the West, it is no good crying over spilled
milk, so in Central Africa it might be considered no good crying over
burst water bottles. They do not grow on trees, and there are no drugstores down
forest pathways.

"All right," I said, "put the baby as near the fire as you safely can, and
sleep between the baby and the door to keep it free from drafts. Your job
is to keep the baby warm."

The following afternoon, as I did most days, I went to have prayers with
any of the orphanage children who chose to gather with me. I gave the
youngsters various suggestions of things to pray about and told them about the tiny baby. I explained our problem about keeping the baby warm enough,
mentioning the hot water bottle, and that the baby could so easily die if it got
chills I also told them of the two-year-old sister, crying because her mother
had died.

During prayer time, one ten-year old girl, Ruth, prayed with the usual
blunt consciousness of our African children. "Please, God" she prayed, "send us
a water bottle. It'll be no good tomorrow, God, as the baby will be dead, so
please send it this afternoon."

While I gasped inwardly at the audacity of the prayer, she added, "And
while You are about it, would You please send a dolly for the little girl so she
ll know You really love her?"

As often with children's prayers, I was put on the spot. Could I honestly
say, "Amen"? I just did not believe that God would do this. Oh, yes, I
know that He can do everything, the Bible says so. But there are limits, aren't
there? The only way God could answer this particular prayer would be by
sending me a parcel from my homeland. I had been in Africa for almost four
years at that time, and I had never, ever received a parcel from home.
Anyway, if anyone did send me a parcel, who would put in a hot water
bottle?

I lived on the equator! Halfway through the afternoon, while I was
teaching in the nurses' training school, a message was sent that there was a car at
my front door.

By the time I reached home, the car had gone, but there, on the veranda,
was a large twenty-two pound parcel. I felt tears pricking my eyes. I could
not open the parcel alone, so I sent for the orphanage children.

Together we pulled off the string, carefully undoing each knot. We folded
the paper, taking care not to tear it unduly. Excitement was mounting.
Some thirty or forty pairs of eyes were focused on the large cardboard
box.

From the top, I lifted out brightly colored, knitted jerseys. Eyes
sparkled
as I gave them out. Then there were the knitted bandages for the leprosy
patients, and the children looked a little bored. Then came a box of mixed
raisins and sultanas - that would make a batch of buns for the weekend.
Then
as I put my hand in again, I felt the.....could it real ly be? I grasped
it and pulled it out - yes, a brand-new, rubber hot water bottle. I cried. I
had not asked God to send it; I had not truly believed that He would. Ruth
was in the front row of the children. She rushed forward, crying out, "If
God has sent the bottle, He must have sent the dolly too!"
Rummaging down to the bottom of the box, she pulled out the small,
beautifully dressed dolly. Her eyes shone! She had never doubted!

Looking up at me, she asked: "Can I go over with you and give this dolly
to that little girl, so she'll know that Jesus really loves her?"

That parcel had been on the way for five whole months. Packed up by my
former Sunday school class, whose leader had heard and obeyed God's
prompting to send a hot water bottle, even to the equator. And one of the
girls had put in a dolly for an African child - five months before, in
answer to the believing prayer of a ten-year-old to bring it "that
afternoon".

"Before they call, I will answer" (Isaiah 65:24)

It may be a bit long, but at the end, i thought maybe this is what God meant for me to put in to sum up how i feel ;) Hehe.. God's ways are higher than ours! :) Got other stories to tell but that will come over the weekend :) Have a blessed weekend! :)

" Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not go weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31